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  • Mike D. 2:22 pm on March 24, 2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , April Fool's day Open FAQs, Snookie Sponsorship   

    7th AFDO FAQs 

    7th Annual Inaugural (That Mean’s “First”, J. Alex) April Fool’s Day Open to Raise Awareness Frequently Asked Questions  

    Each year the AFDO Rules Committee is inundated with literally tens of questions regarding the event. If this document does not address the question you have in mind, please feel free to contact Ben “Caddy Chairman For Life” Owen. (Henceforth, let “Frequently” mean “at least once” or “anticipated”)

    Q: What the hell is this all about anyway?

    A: A few years ago, a few friends set out one warm day to play Par 3. They realized it was April Fool’s Day, made up some rules, got hammered, fell down…and an event was born. Last year we had 4 eight-somes playing and a gallery of 10 or so.

    Q: Who is this J. Alex character?  (More …)

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  • Mike D. 8:19 am on March 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    Merry St. Patrick’s Day…and Happy Birthday to The Brother 

    I wrote this a few years ago for Spotlight Magazine. It has since become my little brother’s birthday card. One year I posted it on the FaceBooks…Heberble wrote in the comments one of the funniest things I’ve ever read about St Patty’s. Heberble: I always imagined St. Patrick much like Samuel Jackson. “Get these muthaf**kin’ snakes of the muthaf**kin’ island. I hope he gets his own holiday, too.” Heberble makes me laugh.

    Saint Patrick’s Day is my favorite holiday. I grew up believing that March 17th was observed because it was my brother’s birthday. If you ever have the opportunity to be born on a day that most of the English speaking world celebrates, I highly recommend it. A few years ago my birthday fell on Super Bowl Sunday. Enjoying everyone unknowingly joining me for a birthday toast, I realized that my brother experiences this phenomenon every year. It rocked.

    Aside from being the anniversary of my brother’s birth, St. Patrick’s Day is for honoring Saint Patrick’s various religious accomplishments, and as legend has it, for chasing the snakes out of Ireland. Who wouldn’t want to revel in this? Forget the Easter Bunny. I’m for the snake-chasing guy. The good Saint died on March 17th, 460 A.D., which is really ironic. The odds of dying on the holiday named after you have got to be like 1 in 1000.

    (More …)

     
    • Biddy 9:36 am on March 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      I ❤ your brother, and now I officially ❤ you. Best birthday card EVER!

      • Mike D. 10:07 am on March 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Thanks for reading…he’s a good guy…I love him like a brother…

  • Heberble 11:13 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    Well…thanks again to our reader(s?) for joining us tonight. The show itself was pretty intolerable. I hope we were able to bring some humor and fun into your Oscar experience without the threat of ever imparting any actual movie knowledge. Thanks too to Jason, Nina, Angie, Leigh Ann, The Second Levy Twin and any other commenters…

    Not sure when we’ll be ‘live’ again, but keep checking in, because we tend to keep bringing the funny.

     
    • Mike D. 11:16 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      We’re reevaluating our live blogging strategy. Four hour shows that end around zero am and contain little to no funny are not making the cut. Thanks all. Love ya, mean it.

    • JasonP 11:17 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Thanks for letting me play along. But, not thanks for making me watch the Oscars. Except JLo’s boobs.

    • nita 11:21 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      thanks! enjoyed it!

      • Heberble 11:42 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        I meant Nita, not Nina

  • Heberble 11:08 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    I hope the RCA Victor dog shits on the stage.

     
    • JasonP 11:09 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      That would be the perfect capper to the night. (crapper to the night?)

  • Heberble 11:04 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    Artist 2:1
    Hugo 5:1
    The Help 6:1

    Everyone else 15:1

     
    • JasonP 11:05 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Artist: 1:1. Wait, that’s a sucky bet

    • Leigh Anne 11:05 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      I picked The Artist…but I hope it’s The Help.

      • Leigh Anne 11:06 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        (o;

      • Leigh Anne 11:07 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Uggie tipped the ballot (o;

    • Heberble 11:06 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Praise Lord Xenu

    • JasonP 11:06 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      No surprise there.

  • Heberble 11:03 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    Nine? C’mon Academy….you need to be able to narrow down your nominations…

     
    • JasonP 11:04 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Especially this dreck

      • JasonP 11:04 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Not that I’ve seen any of them. Except “Moneyball”. Which was entertaining, but I certainly wouldn’t vote for it.

    • Mike D. 11:04 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Since there are no horses in the audience we know that one’s not getting it…

    • Mike D. 11:05 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Pretty sure my prediction of artsy-fartsyest is safe.

      • JasonP 11:07 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Lol. That is the perfect explanation for why it won.

    • Mike D. 11:06 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Boom. shaka. Laka. It’s like I’m psychic.

  • Mike D. 10:59 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    So dressing like the statue was a good plan.

     
  • Heberble 10:59 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    Hm. Another lifetime achievement award

     
  • Heberble 10:51 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    So. Hugo wins the first half of the Oscars. Seems like The Artist is winning the second half. I guess it has been awhile since a silent film won. On an unrelated note, glad to see Deepak Chopra has got himself a gig.

     
  • Mike D. 10:50 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply  

    The star of the silent movie wins best actor. There is probably a lesson/message/platitude here…but, I’m not sure what it is.

     
    • Leigh Anne 10:51 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Vive la France

      • Heberble 10:51 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Or…when the French people don’t speak, they win awards.

        • JasonP 10:52 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          And another funniest comment.

        • Mike D. 10:53 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          “…and to drink….Peru!!!”

    • JasonP 10:52 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      I can end the suspense for everyone. “The Artist” will win Best Picture.

    • The 2nd Levy Twin (Paul) 10:53 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Mel Brooks won an Oscar? Sorry…wrong Silent Movie. Although that may have been more entertaining

    • JasonP 10:55 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Best Actress could go to any of them. Smart money’s on either Rooney or Violet, but Glenn has the “old Hollywood” thing going for her.

      • Heberble 10:56 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Im guessing Violet, despite my earlier prediction.

        • JasonP 10:57 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          Of course, Meryl could always win, and she has the dress…

          • JasonP 10:59 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

            I think it’s the dress. Seriously.

            • Leigh Anne 11:00 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink

              Could be the dress…good call.

          • JasonP 10:59 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

            Rooney looks pissed.

      • Leigh Anne 10:56 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Viola…

        • JasonP 10:57 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          Oh. Sorry

        • Heberble 10:58 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          I meant Viola.

          • JasonP 10:58 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

            I was blindly guessing and got most of the letter right.

        • Leigh Anne 10:59 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

          Dang… Go, Meryl!

      • The 2nd Levy Twin (Paul) 10:57 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        Old is the right word.

    • JasonP 11:02 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Is she still talking?

      • JasonP 11:02 pm on February 26, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        She started off so well with the “whatever”, then blah, blah zzzzzzzzzz

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